Reinin' in the brain train

My head is way too full tonight. I have a plethora (I love that word!) of thoughts racing and chugging and sluggishly slithering through my head.

Xander could not fall asleep tonight. I finally was able to sing him to sleep 20 minutes ago. He's refused to have me sing to him, since it knocks him right out, but tonight he was so frustrated he asked, and hey - it worked! When he was born, I sang him to sleep from day one, and he's been inadvertently programmed to fall asleep to music...a bad thing at camp, where there's always music, and and worse at musical theatre and tap classes, where he starts to sing/dance and immediately begins to yawn...oops!

But it was a bit sad, too...the number one lullaby, always, from the very first, was Morningtown Ride. I sang it tonight and he said "I don't know that one"... I'm sure he must, somewhere, deep inside - we sing it at camp and I know I still sing it about once a month or so...but in his sleepiness, he didn't remember, and that made me a little blue. But being asked to sing, and being able to, balanced that out, since I miss that part of the bedtime routines and rituals.

I'm having a bit of a crisis, with him having turned 7 yesterday. In my mind, 7 is the beginning of big kid-dom. I fear the loss of innocence, of believing in magic and santa and tooth-fairies and all that. Of the advent of the type of independence that includes not holding my hand or collecting kisses and all that cuddly stuff. It won't go away right away - he's still mostly little, but I guess I know that it is coming, eventually, and that makes me sad. I get to trade that in for the fun of a 10 year old eventually, and I'm not being sarcastic or tongue in cheek at all - 10 to 12 year old boys rock. They're still a little innocent and sweet and looking to adults for approval, but have developed the coolest sense of humour and understanding too. Of course, now that I think about it, that's pretty much where Xander is now - he has that incredible understanding, humour and quickness of wit, and a vocabulary of a 17 year old (tested and true), so I already have that. But not the life experiences yet, which will come. Anyways, it's on my mind that my baby is growing up, and I don't know that we'll have another...years of trying (not crazy/wholeheartedly/gone to a doctor, but still...) and no luck., And there's my awful thyroid plus my un-diagnosed other weird symptoms...So I'm watching my babay grow up and I'm melancholy.

But I do get to hang with him every day, and enjoy it to very hilt, which I shall do. I'm trying to figure out our homeschool curriculum, and my brain is full up with that too.

I think we'll follow BC curriculum for science - it's very specific and well laid out. Plus our own extras when we're curious about stuff. I really want to get into using the proper scientific method this year. I asked him one day what his theory was about something or the other, and he said "Well, my hypothesis is..." in a lazy sort of drawl, like why wouldn't I use the right word, anyways?

Socials - a bit of the BC curriculum, but then added to. We want to study Ancient Greece in depth, and its normally done in grade 7, so we'll modify and adapt it. History, geography, mythology, art and architecture, science and philosophy. Since it's the basis of Western Civilization, we might as well start there now and build on it.
But then we'll add the stuff we need to about BC and Canadian geography and map work, a bit of First Nations stuff, though that's grade 4, so we need only touch on it. It should fly by.

We're also going to do a massive and intense unit study that will cross curriculums - we're going to create a country, probably with magical creatures and so on. We'll create the geography and maps, land forms and environmental stuff, a history and culture, transportation, a legal system and all that sort of stuff. Xander's completely pumped about it. We'll make a tourist brochure and do advertising, invent a currency, a governement, flag, anthem, shield of arms - the whole works. We can compare it to Canada, and to historial periods as well. It'll be creative writing, socials studies, english, art, and possibly some math as well. I thik it'll be fun. And maybe we can do a presentation at camp next year as well, which would be a riot.

Then math - he's doing grade 3 math and wants to do 2 years worth again, so grade 3 and 4 this year. I want to keep him in workbooks, though, so he doesn't get bogged down by the copying from a textbook yet, so I'm having a hard time finding workbooks that fit well. We'll figure it out. He can learn the copying when he gets into grade 3, which is when they're supposed to do it. With the dyslexia, it's hard enough as is, and he's so good at the math I don't want to frustrate him with the details.

Anyways, there's the reading which I still need to figure out. Reading and writing and all that jazz, which I'll write about another time. Plus cursive handwriting this year, and typing as well. Not much else with the computer yet - he's pretty darn good already. Though I may set him up a blog space too.

What else is on my brain? I'm determined this year to get in shape. Lose weight and get my energy and bounce back. So that's on my mind too. Planning how to be sensible about it, and make it a lifestyle thing, and not a deprivation. Setting goals and rewards and a simple plan I can easily follow when the fall and winter doldrums hit and I am wanting to backslide...maybe we need to plan a winter holiday to a place where I'd need to be in a swimsuit...

But I want it to be fun too, so am looking into bellydance and yoga classes, and planning on going out dancing regularly - when Rob's in town to be home with the boy of course. He's not a dancer, so it's not a punishment for him! I head out when he's getting tucked into bed, but am home by midnight, before the clubs get crazy. Just once a week, at an alternative club for 80's night, which draws a funky and harmless crowd. Not a meat amrket, and I can dance by myself and not get bothered, which is good. Its the best, most fun and releasing exercise for me.

What else - its been the Rob Show all weekend - grand reviews and interviews and profiles everywhere. He went from over 12,000 in the amazon.ca rankings to 1100 overnight from Friday to Saturday, and then today he hit 10th!!!!! They change hourly based on current sales and we don't know what actual sales are, but the ranking is very promising. He stayed at 10th for an hour but has been firmly in the 20's ever since...Fingers crossed that its going as well in the actual stores too. He has a huge advantage of working in the field and therefore being able to see the weekly sales report from the whole country - the one the booksellers get. Plus an inside scoop into the big chains through a friend. Its been incredibly exciting and uplifting for him, and we get to come along for the ride. First launch party is here on Tuesday! Then the next night in Vancouver. Busy week.

Speaking of - back to work tomorrow to get things set up. Kids back the following week. Not too keen on that aspect of my life, but it'll be fine once I'm back in the swing of things. I'm, sure. Really, truly...keep telling myself that, at least....I miss the kids and families and almost all of my crew from last year is back - of the 3 that aren't, 2 were my severe behaviour wild children, so the tone will be much different. Though I loved having them with me too - it let me keep my fingers in, as it were, with my kind of kids. But it'll be calmer and safer for my others. Its the non-kid stuff that has me stressed, since I don't do things the way the larger school does - I'm hands on, getting down and dirty and playing and cuddling and sitting on the floor and I let the parents in to hang with us, which is not okay. Problem is, I only hear about what I'm doing wrong from other staff, and the administraor has never approached me. But I know there's a lot of things she doesn't like. I've heard about them, and her proposed changes, but never from her. So I need to make an appointment to sit down and hash it ut and I'm dreading that. A lot.

Okay, my newest resolution is bed at midnight, which it is, so I'm offsky then (as the Nac Mac Feegles would say). Still have a couple of jobs to do, but once we're back in the swing of things, and my boys go to bed at their regular earlier hours, it'll be good. I need that sleep, but I love my night time solitude as well...I have to find a balance, and I'm working on it.

I'm sure there's more on the brain, but it fels good to get this much out!